catching up

I was greatly inspired by an artist friend who did a thousand 5x5 drawings with another artist and then they set up a small event one evening to offer them for sale. I was inspired not so much by the selling but the fact that they completed a thousand drawings.

Hence I decided to put together my own 4x4 paintings, maybe not a thousand but I am thinking of aiming for a hundred before the year ends. I will even be happy with fifty but I hope I can push myself to making more. This is my first set of six paintings. The images were done with watercolor and Derwent Inktense, the text (except for Begin) overlaid with Overgram. I intend to hand-write the final text when paint is sufficiently dry.

My plan to put up a proper art wall has been delayed given my recent decision to move house so maybe by the time I am ready to put it up there will be more pieces to play with.

monday meanderings

I really should not be meandering. I am up to my eyeballs in to-dos and I have been having bouts of hyperventilation since this morning from sheer stress over work.

Taking power naps help to calm me down, as well as eating. Then there's sneaking in a few chapters from a book and stealing a few minutes to paint.

For the rest of June, my work schedule will be rather tricky. Three projects overlapping. I know I mentioned sometime ago that I would not even attempt doing TWO simultaneous projects and now I have three. What can I say? The bills have to be paid and one of those three projects has proven to be a profit loss for me so I have to make up for that loss by stuffing in two other projects.

Bills and day-jobs can really be major killjoys sometimes.

the infinite stuff

There is no lack. The gifts of the universe are limitless. Be grateful. Know what you want. Be the best you can be. Be authentic. Be true to your passions. What is yours will come to you if you truly believe. Have faith. Life is always good. Be patient. Follow your true path. Find your North Star.

a sunday cat, and some sunday thoughts

I have been trying to get myself to work since this morning. So far I have ended up writing pieces that had nothing to do with work, and watching the last episode of Downton Abbey, and reading a book.

It is impossible to work on a Sunday. One can feel the holiday-ness of it. Even the sun is a certain shade of gold that meant Rest and Play.

I thought I have not made any art for weeks so I took out my little Moleskine plain notebook and made this:

I was hoping it would get me energized to work. It didn't. Why do I even bother to try to work in the first place? I think I feel guilty for being sick last Friday and not being able to work at all.

I also do not trust my immense capacity to:

Work pains me. At least the kind of work that takes me away from the writing I want to do and the art I want to make. It would not have been so bad if it were simple work, nothing that taxed me to the point of exhaustion. But the nature of my day-job demands a lot of mental effort, and mental effort is exhausting. I also have to exert extra effort to make up for my lukewarm heart.

I am reading this book on the science of success and I can understand perfectly what it is trying to say but as simple as it sounds, it is very difficult to practice. My mind is a noisy babble of anxiety and impatience that possibly slows me down towards the life I want.

I must not be distracted. The day-job is a means to an end. I must be careful not to get trapped as if it is an end in itself. I was in that cage once. I must never get caught again.

"Play your roles, but KNOW that they are NOT YOU." - Joseph Campbell

birthday greeting for my best friend

born on the 12th of May

Afternoon Break

I am at the hard tedious sludgy part of the work which is trawling through the raw data for patterns and themes and unearthing meanings. There is so much slow reading to be done and what makes it difficult is the time given. I think it would not have been so bad if I had enough time. But I never seem to have enough time and I always have to rush or I always have something else urgent on top of it.

Work has been rather slow since after lunch so I finally took a break and made this:

"Sleeping"
Derwent colored charcoal and Inktense on Moleskine

Now I am hoping that letting my inner child have free rein and make art will make it let me work with more speed and better focus.

currently hooked

The exercises get more complicated as the chapters go by but I am having tons of fun! This is certainly something to feel good about when other things in my life are needing a boost.

I have been having dreams of slaying dragons and I know my subconscious is telling me something very important. Maybe I will meditate on it by painting more.

pastel techniques with charcoal + Derwent Inktense

An artist friend lent me his brand-new book on pastels and today I started reading it. It is a very useful and easy to understand book which is very helpful for beginners like me.  I applied the techniques on charcoal and Derwent Inktense although I also plan to use pastels later on. Right now I am too in love with Inktense.

The first drawing practice was of grapes and bananas. Here is my attempt. Since I am using Inktense, I have the choice of adding water to the colors afterwards, which I did.

Second drawing was citrus fruits.

What new thing are you learning these days?

novel in progress

My Derwent Inktense has opened up new ways of making art and creating illustrations for my fantasy novel which I started out last November via NaNoWriMo. I am in no rush to publish because I want it to be done well. I have decided it will be an illustrated novel and that I want it printed on "aged"-looking paper. Which means that actual printing will probably take a while and I will have to start with digital publishing if I want to get all the colors and images in. I will be self-publishing so I only have myself yelling at myself to get some work done everyday.

Here is the draft of my cover:

And here is my initial attempt at a map. I need one because the place is pure invention.

One of the key items in the story is an urn and I have imagined it to be this:

I find myself progressing faster when I added the illustration work alongside the writing. So it is like watching and listening at the same time and then somehow managing to take it all down on paper as the story unfolds. Rather tricky but also surprisingly motivating. The story feels more substantial because I have visual anchors. Besides, I have always loved the interplay between words and images and I am delighted to have the opportunity to use both in this story.

At some point I would like to be able to draw people because there are some scenes I would just love to portray. I can draw women but drawing men needs more practice. We'll see how that goes.

I might also begin on some illustrations for the poetry books and those I need to prioritize because they will be "released" ahead. By released I mean producing the book in high-quality PDF/e-book format and sharing a portion of the first volume for free, like a Kindle sample. Then the full volume can be available by order. I don't know yet how I will do the sharing and ordering but I guess I will just play it by ear.

What have you been up to lately?

inktense urge

This set of Inktense Blocks was an impulse purchase. Although it has been on my wishlist since August of last year, it was not a priority item. It is an expensive brand and work projects have been few and far between.

But there I was, standing in front of the display, and all of the sudden there was a surge of energy from the pit of my stomach and the next thing I knew...

most unexpected gift this Christmas

Possibly the most expensive too. This was given by my dad. ^_^

oh joys!

I was out for most of the day. I just got home now (it's almost five o'clock in the afternoon).

Do you trust this face?

First I dropped off a number of things at my parents' house -- most are long overdue errands that I finally got around to completing.

Second I went to meet up with my bookseller friend who is also my main source for Moleskine, Field Notes, and Fashionary notebooks (and lots of rare finds in secondhand books). I got a Fashionary in pastel yellow to see if it and I will be a productive and creative pair.

My dear friend and I had a really good catching up and my spirits were definitely cheered (given my recent bouts with a few specific stressful situations). As I was window-shopping later in the afternoon I thought about what made the meet-up and the conversation so enjoyable and heartwarming, and this is what I wrote in my journal (written in a cafe during a quick break):

"What conversations between friends should be: enlightening, interesting, a mutual exchange of information, open sharing, relaxed, laced with genuine laughter (as opposed to mocking laughter or derisive laughter or making-fun-of laughter or fake/polite laughter), free comfortable exchange of questions and answers, sharing of ideas, without competition or seeking to impress to elevate status, no defensiveness, no suspicions, no careless criticisms, no judgements, no unkind or demeaning jokes, mutually supportive and encouraging. Time will pass and you won't feel it and you won't mind if you do realize that you have just consumed an hour just conversing."

So it wasn't much of a surprise that I was walking around the mall with a small happy smile on my face.  Even just one good friend can do wonders to raise one's level of optimism and satisfaction about life.

I next went to a bookstore and after much staring and lingering at the really expensive Derwent products locked inside the glass display cabinets, I approached a saleslady to ask how much the Derwent Waterbrush cost. I was thinking it would be perfect for when I need my art materials to be portable. It costs Php400 for a single brush! That's expensive. So it went on my to-save-up-for list.

However I did not leave the bookstore empty-handed because I found a decently-priced set of gouache. I've been wanting to try it and I did promise myself a little treat for the week.

Supermarket shopping was next on my to-do, but I just picked very specific items that I could not find in my regular supermarket. Hence I hoarded arugula and organic romaine lettuce and I got special fish steaks for my dad's birthday lunch on Monday. The rest of my grocery list can be filled in tomorrow in my regular store.

Last stop was to check Healthy Options for loose leaf tea as I am totally out. I have Earl Grey and English Breakfast but I've been craving for something fruity and not in a bag.

I have to say that this Saturday has been a joyful day indeed. And it's not even over yet -- while I fuss with my newly-acquired goodies I am also waiting for my sister to call and let me know if we will be having dinner out. But even if that does not push through, there is more than enough happiness spilled over from the morning and afternoon to get me through humming well into the night.

How is your weekend going?